The Dark Side of Conformity

Newsweek International has published an absolutely fantastic article on school bullying. As many of you already know, there have been a frightening amount of suicides in Japan last year because of this.

I am a father of a three-month year old boy now who will be going to school in Japan. And I know bullying is a part of every school kids life. But in Japan it has gotten to a point where I believe we could call it a pandemic and we wouldn’t be wrong. Although there were previous attempts to help parents and teachers curb the problem the situation is still out of control.

And that’s just not bloody good enough.

Christian Caryl and Akiko Kashiwagi report for Newsweek International here. After you read the article, post your thoughts below as it lends its self very well to opinions and debate.

6 Responses to “The Dark Side of Conformity”

Danny Bloom Said:

Wow, Alex, this has been going on in Japan schools for a very long time, and in the last 20 years it has only gottten worse, with no end in sight. of course, it is a worldwide problem, but a big one in Japan. not a day goes by….etc etc…

Since you are in Canada, if there is any chance to raise your children in Canada and send them to Canadian schools, do it. Really. The bullying problem is basically enshribed in the Japanese psyche, and there is not help. It just gets worse….

anonymous Said:

Admittedly I haven’t been through the Japanese school system or had a child do so (and I’m not a huge fan of the Japanese school system anyway), but I’m not sure such pessimism about the system in Japan compared to Canada is warranted.
In the past year or so, the problem of school bullying has gotten onto the public radar in Japan in a big way — in fact this itself is probably one reason bullying is becoming more visible — it’s being reported more (which is a good thing). Yes, this concern will likely die down somewhat in the future if kids stop offing themselves, but precedents have been set — schools have changed their policies, teachers have been let go. I don’t want to downplay the problem or make it sound like it’s going to change overnight; I just don’t think that being fearful before the fact is necessary — concerned and cautious, sure.
And with regard to the situation in our home countries, well perhaps it was better (although the UK is especially notorious in this area), but people have famously poor recollection of the bullying that went on around them in their childhood, unless they were the ones being bullied. A handful of poor bastards at my school were taunted, beaten and robbed practically daily. A couple of teachers taunted the unpopular kids in front of the class, just for fun. I remember one PE teacher in particular had such disgust for the weaker kids’ inability to defend themselves that he really egged on the rest of the class to push them around. And about the racial angle, well minority kids (mostly the east & south asian ones) took a fair bit of racial taunting even in my multicultral Canada. I would think that part at least has improved in the past 20 years or so, but still…

scubajim Said:

I haven’t been to Japan and can’t address how prevelant the problem is or isn’t in Japan. I suspect it is very prevelant.

Bullying is a form of relational aggression. Rachael Simmons wrote two informative books on the subject “Odd Girl Out” and “Odd Girl Out Speaks”. When relationships and conformaty trump good behavior you see an upsurge in relational aggression. Look at Jr. High and High School girls (mainly) and you will see the cool girls. They will have a queen bee surrounded by wanna bees. The queen bee maintains control by bullying. She manipulates the others into ostracizing one of her “friends” for the week or two. Then she brings that one back into the fold and selects a new target. Thus everyone lives in fear that they will be ostracized. So they all continue to play the game. (to girls relationships are more important that the quality of the relationship)

So in a society which demands conformity and runs rampant with “Chinese whispers” is it any surprise there is a lot of bullying? (and yes, it is a problem in the US school system)

SparkyStark Said:

This article reminds me of a book I’m currently reading.

“Shutting out the Sun: How Japan Created it’s Own Lost Generation” by Michael Zielenziger. It was published in late 2006 so it’s pretty up-to-date. It discusses the state of the Japanese school system and the general culture around bullying and how prevalent it is.
It’s main focus is the hikikomori of Japan (or people (mostly young men) that shut themselves inside their rooms for months or years at a time unable to deal with Japanese society). The book contains several interviews with hikikomori and friends and family of those affected. A constant theme of bullying and breaking down under the stress of constant competition in school seems to be the spark for the condition in every single instance through-out the book.
It’s a pretty comprehensive book on the topic. I highly recommend it to anyone who wants to learn more about some of the problems brought up in the Newsweek article.

SayNo Said:

There is a Dutch writer called Trix van Dugteren who wrote a great book about bullying at school. It calls: ‘Pesten. Wat vind jij?’ What means: ‘Bullying. What do you think?’. It helped me and many other kids! I can advise you all to read this great book with many advises and solutions. Please Google : ‘Trix van Dugteren, pesten’ and you will find the book and publisher in The Netherlands.

SayNo Said:

Please do read the book about bullying written by Trix van Dugteren!

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