Maid in English

• 1

  I got dragged along to a stupid ‘Neko Cafe’ on the weekend. It was pure hell.

  riki on June 24th, 2008
• 2

  Elaborate on this outing, riki. Please?

  Betty Woo on June 25th, 2008
• 3

  hey betty actually I wrote about it in my diary. I’m hoping the blog will bleep my expletives:

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  Today we went to the shittiest cafe ever and I almost feel bad for saying that because I’m sure the owner is a sweet person, who has worked hard to fulfil her dream. Plus I’m sure the concept of a Neko Cafe would have a far reaching appeal to many fur-balls.

  But let’s recount the experience. First we step into the tiny glass foyer, which was uncomfortably small. We remove our shoes and store them in a special locker. That’s pretty normal for Japan, expect in this case the patrons were all seated on lounges and western style tables and the straw slippers are too fucking small. Then we move to a second set of lockers for bags etc. Next we check-in. Yes it’s only a poxy cafe, not a five star hotel, but they need to process check-ins because this fine establishment charges by the hour. They jot down our time of arrival 2.22 pm and then we queue for the sink, where we’re instructed to sanitise our hands before “enjoy time” with the cats. Then we’re lead to our table, and you guessed it, we can’t even choose our own fucking seats. Welcome to control-freak zone. We’re seated at a bench with a lovely view of a white brick wall. Too bad we missed lunch, because of course, they couldn’t server lunch after 2.00 pm. Why in the name of fuck, can’t they server lunch, all friggin day, I have no idea. But that’s also the norm in Japan. Eat you’re lunch when it suits them.

  So now I order a latte, thinking “get me the fuck out of here”. Do I want desert? No since I haven’t had any fucking lunch yet. Poor Kumi, she’s seated in a corner with no sign of a cat and starting to realise it’s a bit of a freak zone, in the same vein as a Maid cafe. Finally our coffee arrives, in a designer cup, which looks like a real cup that’s been cut in half. How cute, is half a cup of fucking coffee.

  I skull my latte and fifteen minutes later after starring at a white wall, I finally I get to leave. That only set us back ¥1800. Thank you very much.

  oooh I forgot to mention. They had a fucking list of rules on the first page of their menu, which I’m told was required reading. Yeah welcome to fun time. “Kawaii ne!!”

  riki on June 25th, 2008

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