I’m usually quite quick to denounce anything that sounds like a pseudo-scientific fad. And the fact that I’m usually right doesn’t stop the more credulous around me from dismissing me with a sigh and a look that seems to pity my negativity.
I’m not being negative - I just don’t want to devote any brain power to something that’s obvious nonsense. I come from a nation of cynics, after all. It’s in my nature. Here though, I feel dreadfully outnumbered, and as if I’m fighting an uphill battle. And I fear that some time soon, I’ll just stop fighting.
You’ll probably remember the recent natto scam. I remember at the time saying that if something like natto had special slimming powers, then surely my mother-in-law and middle-aged women like her all over Japan would already know this. And would have been telling us. Despite my being dismissed as “negative”, it all proved to be bullshit after not too long, when the proverbial natto hit the fan.
I’ll also never forget the “Hidden dangers in your Kotatsu” programme which ‘revealed’ that if you weren’t careful, you’d be cooked alive by your kotatsu…
Science, I had been led to believe, comes from dreadfully dull but earnest types in labs. It doesn’t come from unqualified, overexcitable goons on a variety show.
But the one that’s bugging me now, and I freely admit to being late to pick up on this, is マイナスイオン - “minus ion” - another bit of ’science’ that seems only to exist in Japan.
True, if you google long and deep enough, you’ll find occasional references going back many years and worldwide. But does any of it actually support the idea? Is any of it more than mere speculation? That’s not important. “Minus Ion” - the trend - has morphed in the media spotlight beyond any need for scientific back-up.
If you’re not familiar with this - and if you don’t live in Japan there’s no reason why you should ever have heard of it - I won’t bore you with the details, except to say it’s a belief that pollution and other harmful particles in the air have a positive charge (”Plus Ion”) and as your body takes them in, it requires negatively charged particles to neutralise them, otherwise you’ll lose the will to live, or something. Sounds like crap? Yes, I thought that too. And yet all over Japan, you’ll find countless machines and accessories which apparently spew out the precious “minus ions”. My wife’s hairdryer, for example…
Anyway, if you’re not daft enough to spend millions of yen on “minus ion” accoutrements, but are still daft enough to believe you need a fix, then you can do so by hanging out occasionally on riversides, in the mountains, near waterfalls and such, so goes the legend. Hence I got an earful of “minus ions” throughout Golden Week, as friends, family, and acquaintances rushed off to the countryside to inhale as many “minus ions” as they could before sucking up all the “plus ions” of the U-Turn Rush.
Are these people not just talking about what we backwards folks simply call “fresh air”?

Oooh, look at the minus ions on THAT!